a campaign.....by jack

[Jack]

friends.......i come with a heavy heart. ive come to bring awareness to an epidemic that is sweeping accross canada..........nay........the world. gentlemen, everyday millions of tops around the world suffer needlessy.......these majestic entities are used......and abused......and then left to freeze on our tables, our shelves and in our top boxes.............gentlmen i am calling for an end to their suffering! that is why i am proud to anounce that i am standing up for the rights of spintops around the world and saying "no! you cant just leave that there! u cant!" gentlmen..........i give to you:
toques for tops
a campaign to rid every spintop of the harsh cold of being still. gentlemen let us give our tops a real "rest" where they can be warm! and comfertable! and feel wanted! and let them know yes we care, yes we appreciate, yes we will give them the best damn life a top could have! we owe it to our tops gentlemen..........we at least owe them that much.........thank you for your time.............




this has been a public service annoucement by jack........which means in no way shape or form should said annoucement, or for that matter jack in general, be taken seriously..........in fact im not sure whos idea it was to let that jackass on here @-@
thank you

[mailman]

Excellent!  Did you knit them yourself?

[ta0]

Well said! 

That was really funny!!!!

[Jack]

Excellent!  Did you knit them yourself?

thank you sir. yes indeed........i knit real hardcore like eh 

Well said! 

That was really funny!!!!

thank you sir!

[mailman]

Really? A fellow knitter AND top spinner?  How cool is that?   

[lincolnrick]

Well done Jack. 

[the Earl of Whirl]

I am not familiar with toques.  It is not a normal Ohio phrase. 

I have studied up and now I know more about toques for tops!

[cecil]

Amen.

[johnm]

 

Every good campaign needs a rousing song!
Perhaps this is worth consideration.   (No tops in this video.  You've been warned so no apologies if you get this song stuck in your head today.  )

Earl, note at 0:40
question: How come he's not wearin' a toque?   
answer: Oh, he's not from the Great White North, eh.   

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Jm4LoOaAWI

[the Earl of Whirl]

I learned a few things from that video.

First of all, I learned "toque" is really pronounced "teuuuu - ke".

I also learned that I have been going the wrong way with my trips heading south to North Carolina and Florida because I should "take off to the great white north"!

[Jack]

Well done Jack.

thank you thank you 

I am not familiar with toques.  It is not a normal Ohio phrase. 

I have studied up and now I know more about toques for tops!

thats the spirit there eh bud!

Amen.

amen

Every good campaign needs a rousing song!
Perhaps this is worth consideration.   (No tops in this video.  You've been warned so no apologies if you get this song stuck in your head today.  )

Earl, note at 0:40
question: How come he's not wearin' a toque?   
answer: Oh, he's not from the Great White North, eh.   

good grief bud i havnt seen those distinguished boys since i was back up the ottawa valley there eh
exccelent song for a campaign eh, beauty beauty 

I learned a few things from that video.

First of all, I learned "toque" is really pronounced "teuuuu - ke".

I also learned that I have been going the wrong way with my trips heading south to North Carolina and Florida because I should "take off to the great white north"!

glad to hear it there eh bud. you may find this video even more informative, red green has been a staple of every canadian life and has provided an outstanding education for many young canadians eh that is when they arent playing shinny (because if its winter red green can wait because why the hell are you inside bud if theres ice to skate on out there eh bud!?).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUXPuYZ4DEQ

[Jack]

Really? A fellow knitter AND top spinner?  How cool is that?   

you knit aswell?! good grief thats a coincidence! this calls for a kniting pattern! 
gentlmen! behold the patern for an officious touqe for tops, it will fit a lonely and cold hp hornet wonderfully 

cast on 32 sts on double pointed needles or magic loop needle thingies
knit 1 1/4'' of 3x1 rib
knit 13 rows of stockinnete
knit 1 knit 2 together knit 1 knit 2 together etc etc for the entire row
knit 3 rows stockinette
knit 2 together knit 2 together knit 2 together etc etc for the entire row
how i like to end toques is detailed in the end of this video here:
https://youtu.be/Xf1IiT7GDVo?t=20m34s

after that simply make yourself a pom pom of any desired size and poof! officious toque for a top! @-@

edit: just relised i forgot the tension, its 5 sts pi

[Jack]

gentlmen! i feel we digress! for this is not simply a "canadian" problem, this is an michigan problem a new orleans problem a skullbone tennessee problem and gentlmen im agrieved to say.......it is an epidemic facing hundreds of tops in that most beloved of destinations....miamisberg. that is why mike.....as soon as i can get my hands on more yarn by god i will send you one for that most blessed of places known as miamisburg 

edit: it has just occured to me: mike is your church in miamisberg or do u just travel over there every year? 

[mailman]

Really? A fellow knitter AND top spinner?  How cool is that?   

you knit aswell?! good grief thats a coincidence! this calls for a kniting pattern! 
gentlmen! behold the patern for an officious touqe for tops, it will fit a lonely and cold hp hornet wonderfully 

cast on 32 sts on double pointed needles or magic loop needle thingies
knit 1 1/4'' of 3x1 rib
knit 13 rows of stockinnete
knit 1 knit 2 together knit 1 knit 2 together etc etc for the entire row
knit 3 rows stockinette
knit 2 together knit 2 together knit 2 together etc etc for the entire row
how i like to end toques is detailed in the end of this video here:
https://youtu.be/Xf1IiT7GDVo?t=20m34s

after that simply make yourself a pom pom of any desired size and poof! officious toque for a top! @-@

Yes, indeed, I am a knitter.  I knit mostly hats, with a group that gives them to chemotherapy patients and the homeless.  We meet once a week, and I thoroughly enjoy it. 

I like the way that lady ends her toques in that video, btw.  I'm going to have to try that....

[Jack]

Yes, indeed, I am a knitter.  I knit mostly hats, with a group that gives them to chemotherapy patients and the homeless.  We meet once a week, and I thoroughly enjoy it. 

I like the way that lady ends her toques in that video, btw.  I'm going to have to try that....

wow so your knitting for an actual good cause, i admire you sir